The third cup 9/7

Hi neighbors. While you sip your coffee today, think about things we take for granted in our lives, and how easy it is for us to slip into a series of habits. Many people say we are creatures of habit. Some researchers say it takes repeating something seven times for it to become a habit. Like most "theories" I think there are more than two possibilities. On one hand, we are comfortable in our daily routine. But on the other hand, breaking out of that routine is why we all insist on taking vacations. How often, though, do we find ourselves just repeating our usual habits in strange surroundings while we take our habits with us on our vacation? My children tell me I need to develop new habits. But I'm happy with my old ones. If it's not broke, why fix it? "Why do you always watch the same shows you've seen before?" my children ask. Simple. When I know what's going to happen next, I can clean house, do laundry, wash dishes, walk the dog and still not feel disappointed when I miss some important scene. I'll admit, some habits are just quirky, but typical. Like always turning right when I go into a store. I'm not alone on this one. I've seen the research. It's figuring out that I do it as a habit that is interesting. Habits become such a part of our lives that we don't realize we do the same things the same way the same time day after day, week after week. And even worse, year after year. I think our personal habits are often the most argued over things in a marriage. At least the first year of a marriage. Anyone put in a situation that involves sharing personal living space with someone else, like a college dorm or having a room mate; has to learn to tolerate other people's own way of doing things. Everyone does things their own way. Little things. Like how you squeeze toothpaste out of the tube, which side of the sink you want the dish detergent sitting on, where you want the trash cans. New couples argue and fuss over these things that to us at first seem like matters of life or death. Hopefully we get past these awkward moments without throwing things or losing a room mate. The odd thing is, married couples report after years of marriage it is still the little ways they interrupt each other's habits that cause the trouble and sometimes arguments in a normally happy home. The important thing to remember would be that these habits are really only our personal way of handling our daily lives. I would imagine even primitive people stacked their stuff in a particular corner of the cave. Still we stick to our own habits as if our lives depended on it. When I miss Murder She Wrote in the morning, or Cybill in the afternoon, I lose track of time. My entire daily rhythm is thrown out of whack. If they move my favorite shows around, which they do every September; it takes half the season to adapt. When a store moves its shelves around, I get completely lost. When a highway is under repair and I have to take a detour, I freak out. I just know I'm going to get lost. Any deviation from my routine takes a long time to adapt to. Yes, I've read the research. These are all symptoms of aging. Does that mean I need to change my habits? Do I have to accept a new habit of worrying about road conditions, which store I shop at and start buying a television guide? I don't think so. If I have to develop new habits, I want them to lead to less stress and better health. Until the next time friends remember; don't freak out over your own or anyone else's little idiosyncrasies or habits. Once you recognize them for what they are, you can change your own at least. Even if learning to deal with someone else's habits has to be one of your new habits.