The things children say

The following bits of humor and wisdom from children were shared with me by a good friend via e-mail.

She was in the bathroom putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!"

My young grandson called the other day to wish me "Happy Birthday." He asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62."

He was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"

When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure."

"Look in your underwear, grandpa," he advised. "Mine says I'm four to six."

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the truck was a Dalmation dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.

"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."