Task force aims to strengthen parents

While the Vernon County Youth Task Force normally does not meet during July and August, this year they are meeting every few weeks as they work to put together a program to strengthen parenting community-wide.

The task force chair, Dr. Trisha Bridgewater, challenged the group at its last meeting by asking, “How do we help moms and dads in doing the hard work of being good parents to their children?”

For several years, the task force promoted a character education word for each month. At its May meeting, task force members agreed it would be best to highlight four concepts and support them with a special event on a quarterly basis. Further, the group changed its target audience from young people to parents.

Said Bridgewater on Wednesday, “Our children need parents and really all adults to be engaged, positive role models. I see this effort as raising the emotional IQ of the parents of our community.”

For 10 minutes, the 15 participants kept Bridgewater busy recording a long list of possible characteristics for parents to promote.

Since the goal was to select four character traits, those on hand were presented with four adhesive dots and asked to get up and go to the newsprint sheets and place one dot on each trait they wanted chosen.

Once the four were chosen, each word was placed on a separate newsprint sheet and people were asked to coalesce around the one they wanted to work on. Handed a sheet with three questions and space for answers, each small group was asked to create a working definition of their character word, define three things parents and adults can do to emulate that concept and devise ideas for a community strategy to promote the concept.

The concept of responsibility was selected for the months of September through November.

This was defined as “able to be trusted to do what is right or to do the things which are expected or required.”

As to three things parents can do to model this trait, this five person group chose making morally right decisions, following through with what they say and being accountable for their words and deeds.

For strategies to publicize and promote this concept, the group suggested issuing a responsibility challenge to the community titled, “I am the change!” They suggested making this part of the launch of the community-wide parenting initiative, backing this up with a social media hashtag of “#iamthechangenevadamo.”

The group further suggested logging progress with pictures, creation of a marketing poster as well as conducting an evaluation to determine what things garner the greatest positive community response.

From December through February the character word will be “respect.” This will coincide with the multi-school conference entitled, Respect Others, to be held Jan. 20, 2018 at Nevada High School.

While this committee was at work, Bridgewater commented, “In my work [psychiatrist], whether it’s families, couples or individuals, I find so many people just aren’t listening to each other. In national politics and in families, people only listen to those they agree with and write off everyone else. Working through problems can be hard work but the reward is huge and it begins with respect.”

The three-person committee defined the word as “To show regard or consideration for honoring other people and treating them with care and courtesy.”

This group proposed having parents and other adults display good manners, learn to respect oneself and others as well as teaching by example to do good for others.

This group’s strategies begin with asking adults and parents to show self-respect by being on time, prepared, trying to do their best and by being neat and clean. In turn, they want people to show respect to those around them at work, in the community, as well as to family and friends. This group will also encourage people to pay genuine compliments and learn from the reactions.

The third quarter — March, April and May — will focus on perseverance which the four-person group defined as, “Continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure or opposition.”

The first activity is to have parents set a goal with milestones and a completion date and make their children aware of this both to introduce the concept and to promote mutual accountability.

Second, this committee suggested parents play games and do activities with their children which teach perseverance. Finally, the group suggested parents talk to and encourage kids when they are struggling to develop new skills and integrity whether it is through sports and other activities.

This group proposes “doing a 3-month plan with families on setting a family goal to achieve. They are to meet as a group on a regular basis for support and encouragement.” This group wants to get their message out through social media as well as through the local newspaper and radio.

Honesty is the character trait to be highlighted for the summer months.

The three people of this committee defined honesty as the “Quality of being truthful; straightforwardness; absence of lying, cheating, et cetera.”

Suggestions for what parents can do include leading by example so words and actions match. Further, they not only want adults to encourage children to be honest but also for adults to admit how it can be a struggle to be honest and truthful and yet, not give in to lying or hiding the truth.

Finally, they want to encourage adults to appreciate honesty by others. They gave the example of praising a child when he or she admits wrong. The praise is not for the wrong but for having the courage to admit the truth when it is easier to lie, tell people what they want to hear, hide things or reveal only part of the truth.

This group’s strategies include the use of social media, student-made public service announcements on local radio and signs in business windows.

The task force meets in two weeks to refine plans.